Hello,
While I sit here in this tiny internet cafe in Loja, southern Ecuador
it concerns/ bemuses me to observe the sort of stuff my neighbours
spent their $1.20 an hour on. The bloke on my left is flicking between
a porn site and a chat-room (do your children use chat rooms??!!)
and the two women to my right have just visited a site on breast-enlargement.
I don't know how to say this, but ...they might like to consider
plastic surgery a little closer to their hairline. Easier and cheaper
might be a plastic bag over the head.
Within
2 hours of sending the last message I had fallen off the wife and
burnt my leg on the exhaust, leading to me being laid up for the
past three weeks. It is healing nicely now and I hope to be in Peru
very soon. C'est la vie ....
My
French is still better than my Spanish. Why didn't the berry/stripy
shirt/garlic brigade from across the Channel (a third force -whose
language I speak fluently- will never be successful worldwide, because
they fail to realise that no Empire was ever built by occupying
the deck chairs with beach towels alone) invade/ colonise Central
and South America? It would have made things so much easier ....
Since
I last clogged up your inbox I have ridden a grand total of 350km
and spent an average of 3 hours per day in the internet cafe -processing
my inbox, reading newspapers, motorcycle website etc.
There
are so many linked to HorizonsUnlimited.com
I feel quite humble. Thought I was doing something special ... It
seems that every man and their dog (yes, some do take their canine
friend!!!) is wandering around the planet on a motorcycle.
Here
is a snapshot of the responses to my last mail:
I
got nearly 300 replies. A few just said 'I read you'. Lots of you
took the time to write a few pleasant words. THANKS! Some said they
wished they were doing what I was and seemed bored of their mundane
work routine. It may appear strange, but even though I'm laid up
(as opposed to getting laid...) I haven't got round to dreaming
of being back in wet England (has it stopped raining yet?). I have
to remind myself as to how lucky I am to be swanning around the
world with a huge dust cloud in my wake (that is what it is like
sometimes at least).
All
this does mean about 100 dud/still no response addresses, which
when I get round to it, will be given a final meal (of frijoles)
and taken out at dawn...
One
good friend questioned whether I had 450 friends... I don't. I just
collect every semi-illiterate halfwhit's email address and shove
it on my list. - Now we will see who REALLY reads my missives....
One
or two were concerned that they were one of so many getting the
same mail. As this is the time of the year where postmen get backache
delivering all your Christmas scribblings, how many of you can honestly
say you write something different on each card? My ramblings do
take a fair bit of time and effort to compose. It is my best work
(....good night!). This, by the way, is MY Christmas greeting...
No cards from me this year. Can't afford the postage.
One
whinger -who didn't like my sarcasm and claimed there was a definite
correlation between my hitting that drunk in Quito and me mentioning
that US foreign policy had scuppered my travel plans twice too often-
has already been executed.
So
folks, I wish you all lots of fun during the Festive Period and
The Very Best for 2001. Hope to see some of you then too.... My
American readers might also soon be freed of the joke that is your
Presidential Erection.
Shiney
side up and all that, Yours, No Mates Bright
RIP 'Norman' Born Malawi February 2000, MIA Mexico August 2000
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